Is a male therapist right for you?

Does it matter to you?

You may feel that it matters who you see for therapy and that is very much true.

It may be that you feel your problems are best heard by another man, or you might be uncomfortable sitting in a room with a stranger. There has been a lot of research conducted to discover what makes therapy work. Consistently, the findings show that the key factor is the relationship that develops between therapist and client.

The other most important thing is that the therapist adapts to the client’s characteristics, culture and preferences. I understand that sometimes a male therapist feels more of a natural fit for some clients. My Integrative Psychotherapeutic approach is by its very nature, adaptable. We may draw on Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling in a way that suits you. I have a responsibility to listen with openness and in turn you have a responsibility to bring your best resources.

Regardless of gender, you can expect that I will never judge you or your life choices. And I will not offer advice. This relationship is very much about you finding new ways to understand where you have come from and what effect that has had on you.

It may be that you are more comfortable with someone of your own gender and that is fine. The main thing is that you are comfortable and that seeing a male therapist works for you.

Does that mean I will just sit opposite you in silence?

Some clients associate counselling or therapy with a silent therapist sitting opposite them whilst they struggle to find something to say. This approach can work, but it is not how we will work together. I am not passive in sessions, but at the same time you will find that I talk far less than you might expect. This stops you worrying about being interrupted or cut off or misunderstood. Therapy is different to conversation in the outside world, but that is why it works.

My Commitment to You

All relationships are based on trust, and the therapeutic relationship is no different. I will always do my best to understand you and your issues without making any presumptions. Everyone is different and you are entitled to be you and to hold your views about the world. If I struggle to understand, I will ask. I will not judge you and I will presume good intent. I will also be honest so that you will always know where you stand with me.

What You Can Talk About

It is common for clients to be worried about disclosing information, wondering if it is safe to do so. I offer you this list of some things (and there are many others) which clients may have experienced and which can be discussed subject to the requirements for disclosure which you can find here.

Abuse: domestic, sexual, physical or emotional (past or present).
Self harm or suicidal thoughts/attempts.